Gumby vs the Astrobots
It started out as a normal day, me looking for retro video games. I went to GameStop, like I always do, and I found a copy of one of my favorite games that I loved as a child. It was Gumby vs. the Astrobots, a platformer where you play as Gumby or Pokey or other characters and shoot the crap out of enemies by hitting them. Anyways, I asked the cashier how much he wanted for it, and he told me it was free. I was flattered! A great video game for free!

After I thanked the cashier, I went home and popped Gumby vs. the Astrobots in my Game Boy Advance. However, something was off.

The title screen was very disturbing. The walls of Gumby's house were crumbling, and Gumby was not with his family. Instead of the title screen music playing, It played Arctic Antics theme playing very fasted and at a much lower pitch, also in reverse. I was a little scared, and I wanted to turn off the game, but something inside me told me to keep playing.

When I pressed A, it didn't take me to the file select screen. Instead, it took me right into the game, and I was in the House. Gumby, not usually scared, had a frightened and depressed look on his face. After a few seconds, I started on the first level.

When I got to the first level, it wasn't called the name of the first level. Instead it was called:


I was surprised at this. However, I kept on playing. The first level was on fire, the enemies were on fire, everything except Gumby was on fire. every time I hit an enemy, blood squirted out and pooled all over the ground. The enemies didn't explode in a cartoony explosion when they hit the ground, they just fell on the ground in a crumpled heap.

I got to the end and found Gumba in the area where Pokey was. Gumba was bloody and weak. She said in a sad, weak voice, "Please, end my suffering..."

I shoot Gumba and she fell on the ground, dazed. I picked him up and used a hit Move on her. "Do it again, Gumby..." I did it again.

"O...n...c...e...more...Gumby..." Finally, I killed her, and Gumby stood in front of her and blood splattered all over his face.

I vomitted in my lap. I couldn't take it any more. I reached to turn off the game, but Gumby spun around and looked directly into my eyes. I was terrified. He spoke and said, "Don't turn off the game, you worth-for-nothing little fool. Let me do it for you."

At that instant, my Game Boy Advance turned off. I cried my eyes out. I was so scared. I took the game out of my Game Boy Advance, and smashed it, burned it, and did everything you could to destroy it.

I still have nightmares about what I saw. I will never play a Gumby game again, due to my past experiences.

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